November 12, 2007

Child Swapping.

When this piece of news came in the Parent Center Newsletter today in my mail box, my stomach just flipped.

RIYADH (Reuters) - Two boys, one Saudi and one Turkish, will swap homes four years after a hospital gave them to the wrong parents, a Saudi newspaper said Wednesday.

"Mistakes are always possible, but we will try to find who was responsible and hold them to account so it doesn't happen again," Prince Mishaal bin Saud, governor of Najran in the far south of the kingdom, said in comments in al-Watan newspaper.

Saudi health authorities had been reluctant to accept the Turkish father's claim that his son Yacoub was not his, but DNA tests carried out this week proved him right.
Published pictures show a distinctly Saudi-looking Yacoub.

The father of the other child, Saudi national Mohammed al-Monjem, had no inkling that pale-skinned Ali was not his. He will press a 50 million riyal ($13 million) compensation claim against the health ministry, al-Watan said.

Courtesy: http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071107/od_nm/boys_swap_dc

Of course I had to drag Hd and put him in this situation and ask what he would do. He of course knew he was getting into trouble and said that he saw Ashu coming out of me and hence he ll never be in this situation technically! Men! Anyway, after much prodding he said he ll swap if that's what the other parents want! WHAT? Who cares what anyone wants? What do you want, Dude? You mean you will just give up Ashu just because shes not biologically yours? Now he knew for sure he was in trouble and said he had no choice and turned the table and asked what I would do. Hah, that's easy! I ll take Ashu and disappear from the face of the Earth! Why would I give her up? So he tried to make me feel guilty about abandoning my biological child. But then, its all Math, is nt it? 9 months in my tummy Vs 2 1/2 years of being together every single day and seeing the child blossom. Tough but then that's what came to my mind instantly.

What would you do?

November 8, 2007

Happy Diwali!



Dhamaaka Diwali Wishes to all the Mommies and their families! Wishing you all a wonderful year ahead!

Click here to see some wonderful Diwali cards done by Children from the UK which they sent to the BBC. The above picture is one of them.

October 22, 2007

How to move from Blogspot to Wordpress.

Thanks to Poppins, moving from Blogspot to Wordpress has become easier now. Just follow her step by step instructions and Voila! you are done.

Ten Steps to Wordpress Nirvana by the Super Nice Poppins.

July 25, 2007

Female Foeticide and Infanticide in India.

Usha and The Rational Fool have written touching posts on Female Foeticide and Female Infanticide in India. Thought provoking.

Ushas post touches on why Indians seem to prefer a male child and wonders what we women can do to change the situation.

We can be examples of what a woman can be and can do.We can help
change the mindset.Or we can simply ignore the statistic that half a million
girl babies are killed every year and read the supplement on woman power that
came with India Today.


The Rational Fool writes a touching letter to his little sister who is no more. He wonders about the things which force women to abort female foetuses.

I'll pose you a hypothetical situation. Let's say a woman is raped,
and she is pregnant against her will. A staunch feminist, she decides that if it
were a female fetus, she'd carry it to full term, but she's absolutely opposed
to bringing forth a male progeny of the rapist. She wishes to have a gender test
done before she made the choice. I don't think that the State or anyone else has
any business interfering with her choice, do you? Abortion against your will is
a different matter altogether.
Mad Momma joins in.

Don't fool yourself that it's only the poor and uneducated who are
doing it. They can barely afford the sex-determining ultrasound. They throw away
new borns. The foetuses are thrown away by us. The middle class. We're the ones
who can afford the expensive ultrasound in a shady bylane. We're the ones who
have so little value for human life
.

DotMom suggests a solution.
I think the only true solution to female infanticide and female
fetus abortion is to give practical solutions. Let’s start by changing the
International Adoption laws in India. It is nearly impossible for international
parents (who are not Indian citizens) to adopt an Indian child today. I know in
the US alone there are long lines at adoption agencies to get a baby. The
adoptive families will be happy to give a sum of money to the mother of the girl
child for her routine medical care, food etc, along with footing any other
medical bills and then some. Isn’t this a sensible solution?


My two cents on this topic - I do think literacy is the solution. Making education compulsory for all children and strict laws against child labor might help. But then, bribe and dowry are illegal in India. Child labor is illegal. Female foeticide and sex determination tests are also illegal. But are all these laws stopping anyone? I mean, the doctors who are performing the illegal abortions and the ultra sound technicians who are performing the illegal gender determining scans are educated, right? What good is that doing? I think the laws should be more strict on these people first. On an individual level, we all can help by sponsoring a girl child. Its a start.

Do leave your valuable suggestions, solutions or any other information on these issues in any of the above blogs or here. Let us be the change.

July 15, 2007

Talkative toddler is trouble on a plane!

A Mom and her 19 month old Toddler have been kicked off a plane because the kid was repeating "Bye bye plane"! So from next time, I have to cello tape my toddlers mouth as well! Its no fun flying with a kid and these incidents only make it all the more terrible!

At the end of her speech, she leaned over the gentleman beside me and said, 'It's not funny anymore. You need to shut your baby up,'" Penland told WSB-TV in Atlanta.
When Penland asked the woman if she was joking, she said the stewardess replied, "You know, it's called baby Benadryl."

Link via Manchus.

July 13, 2007

Not without an audience!

Go on, have a laugh at the other-peoples-kids expense! ;)


Link via The Visitor.

Happy Weekend! :)

June 29, 2007

Mommies again!

All three of them second time moms. All of them busy buying pink and all of them have June babies. Congrats CK, Rbdans and Noon. Wishing all things wonderful to the baby girls.

Welcome to Planet Earth -
Baby M,
Dlittle &
Kutti Girl.

Help Vinay.

28 years old Vinay is suffering from Acute Myeloid Leukemia and needs a bone marrow transplant. There are nt enough South Asians in the bone marrow registry. It is important that many Indians register to help Vinay and others like him who need a donor.

You can easily register with the Asian American Donor Program (AADP) Registry at http://www.aadp.org . The procedure to register is less than a minute and is not invasive, just a simple swab of the mouth. The AADP recommends that people read about the actual marrow donation procedure on the website before registering.

Go to http://www.helpvinay.org/ for more information.

June 22, 2007

Mommy Meets.

Kiran is planning a Mumbai Mommy bloggers meet and I hope I am not late in announcing it. (Sorry Kiran, totally slipped my mind.) Please go here to her post if you are interested to meet up with fellow mommies. Have fun!

Kay invites Mommies from Toronto for a get together. Click here for details.

And I think the first ever Mommies meet was initiated by Poppins(You will go down in history, P!) in Bangalore and here are the details from the meet which happened early this month.

Any Moms in Zurich interested in this lonely soul?!

June 20, 2007

Piyush.

The brave little guy, Piyush passed away last evening. What do you tell a family when they lose a child? How do you console them? Especially after the child has battled a long fight and given up. Wishing Piyushs parents and everyone in his family a lot of courage and peace. God bless the little soul.

Heres Sunitas posts on Piyush. Take heart Sunita. You are a wonderful person and a great inspiration to Moms like me.

June 18, 2007

What a Wonderful world!

Visitor had sent me a link where an American couple have adopted a boy from India and while reading that blog, it led me to couple of other people whom have also adopted children from India. Its absolutely touching to read them and their entire journey just amazed me. My belief in God has been strengthened after reading these blogs.

Do check out the fascinating stories of
Sananda,
Samedh and
Ben.

June 17, 2007

Fathers Day Special 2

As expected more posts are pouring down. I am constantly holding a tissue and wiping my tears away. And to think that I forgot to wish my dad a Happy Fathers day when I spoke to him today! duh!

Dees heartfelt letter to her Appa. *Your dad helped your mom in cooking? Awww....*

All of four months and Mittu has a way with her words in a letter to her Appa!

Malini describes the day and writes about her father and surprise, surprise - her FIL too! ;)

Promises are made to be broken, Noon! Especially to husbands! ;)

Sheela as usual waves her magic wand and creates exquisite stuff. Check out here and here for some craft ideas.

Heres our dear MM's posts on three generation of fathers! *Warning: This post is a real tear jerker*
And last but not the least, here are both the Trishnas and their poignant posts on their Dads on their Birthdays - Happy Birthday Papa and Daddy...

Long live Dads!

June 16, 2007

Fathers Day Special.

Its raining "Fathers day posts" at the Mommy Blogdom. Make sure you have a box of tissues before proceeding to read them.

Kiran tells us about her dad and the brats dad.

Moppets Mom is a
Daddys girl!

Poppins' valid fears about Daddies and their Cholesterol.

Sunitas touching post on her dad.

Tharini as always paints a picture with her words in her post - Pops!

Wishing all the Daddies a very special Fathers Day! Go on Moms, make it an unforgettable day for the dads! ;)

June 14, 2007

Flying with Kids...

... is nt as easy as some people think it is and I have a recent experience to prove that. Not all parents are irresponsible and some like me are obsessive about the co passengers comfort and I would do ANYTHING to keep my daughter quiet. I talk to her, play with her and let her do whatever she wants as long as she is quiet. Luckily for me, she does nt want to walk or run around the plane. So that's a relief.

Here's Sundars post on the same subject and his plan for a kid friendly airlines! :)
1. I will have wide aisles for kids to run around
2. the walls will be painted with Disney , Sesame street, Barney, Dora characters.
3. I will hire daycare teacher turned air-hostesses or air-hostesses turned daycare teachers only!
4. Will not have any carbonated or sugary drinks on the flight that would make the kids hyper.

after reading this article by Vir Sanghvi.
What is it with us? Why don’t we recognize that as much as we love Chunnu, Munnu, Pappu, Bunty or Pinky, the rest of the world is under no obligation to regard them with similar indulgence? Worst of all is the feeling of entitlement that prosperous parents have.They believe that because they are rich, their kids have the right to do whatever they feel like. It’s a funny thing but the children of less-wealthy or poor parents never behave quite as badly as the children of the rich. Perhaps this is because the social inequalities of India mean that their parents themselves lack the confidence to cause a stir in public places. But rich kids—they are even worse than their parents.

Personally, this popular opinion that "mothers want the entire world to praise their kids" gets my goat! I dont go to all that trouble of traveling with a toddler so that some tom, dick and harry can say how cute my daughter is! For all you know, I would be happy if total strangers ignore my daughter in this bad, bad world we currently live in!

Links via The Visitor.

May 15, 2007

May 13, 2007

Happy Mothers Day!

Wishing all the Mommies a very Happy Mothers day! Have fun!

May 9, 2007

A Play Date Problem.

An Indian Mommy is facing a dilemma. This is how she explains it:

"A friend of mine keeps calling my kids over for a play date with her kids.They're all the same age. For some reason, my children don't want to go to her house. They haven't said why, but they are most reluctant. I suspect it's because the parents yell at their children a lot, and that scares my kids.I don't know how to say no to this woman. I usually don't reciprocate by calling her kids over, but she doesn't seem to get the hint. In fact, she'll call and invite her kids over. I have run out of excuses now. I can't tell her what the problem is to her face - Indians simply don't do that."

She also adds that her kids have no problem if her friends children come to their place. They just don't want to go to her friends house.

Any suggestions?

May 7, 2007

Adoption in India.

The Visitor has done a fantastic job by putting together some information on how to go about Adoption in India. I am reproducing the entire post here as per his(?) suggestion.

Please do leave a link in the comment box if any of you have any relevant information.

Thanks a tonne, Visitor.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today CNN-IBN was flashing a 'news' item about baby Shiv being given for adoption to a family after a court battle - read Court gives abandoned baby to millionaire family.

In my youth, after reading 'inspirational stories' in Reader's Digest, in a bout of idealism, I too had often harboured visions of having adopted children. I remember that some friends of ours, a childless couple by choice, had adopted a boy and a girl. I used to be surprised that they had decided to have only adopted children, because I think it requires mental maturity and strength to be able to do it. Today, if I ask myself whether I am mentally prepared to adopt a child, my response would be no. I think I dont possess the mental reserve to take up such a commitment.

From what they said, I gathered that the legal adoption process in India, was a rigorous and often times a time-consuming process. And not without reason - they check the background of the prospective parents, their marital stability, financial stability, mental preparedness and various other parameters.

Recently in Indian Mommies, in a debate on whether one should have the second baby or not, some mommies had expressed the desire to adopt a second child.

I thought it might be useful to share some information regarding the adoption process in India. (Courtesy: Google) :)

To start with one can see the FAQ section of indianngos.com - which gives a brief outline of the process through its FAQ.

ICHILD - India Adoption Resources - is a website and mailing list, that gives support to persons who are thinking of adoption. I quote from their web-site:

The purpose of the ICHILD WEB SITE & MAILING LISTS would hopefully be to offer a source of inspiration, information, support & resources for those interested in adoption from India and the subcontinent. And of course, to help bring together prospective adoptive parents and children in India who wait for their families.

This link takes you to the adoption process page from their site.

Alliance for Children is an adoption agency that places children with adoptive parents.

The Alliance for Children, Inc. is a non-profit international adoption agency based in Massachusetts, serving families throughout the USA.

We have placed thousands of children from around the world in permanent adoptive homes.

They are currently not accepting applications for adoption of children from India.

Catalysts for Social Action (CSA) - This site also provides some info on in-country adoption process, costs etc.

Catalysts for Social Action (CSA) is a Social Welfare Organization promoted by Kale Consultants Ltd., India, a reputed IT Consulting Company with global presence. CSA commenced operations in September 2002. We work on Child Welfare which includes Adoption, Foster Care, and Institutionalised Rehabilitation. Our specific focus is on Adoption. A key role for us is to work as Catalysts / Change Agents. Our aim is to enhance the total number of adoptions in the country. Also, to work towards better child care while the child is institutionalized.


CARA - Central Adoption Resource Agency - this site provides information on adoption in/from India. One can download relevant forms too from here.

Central Adoption Resource Agency is an autonomous body under the Ministry of Women & Child Development, which functions as the Central Authority of the Government of India in matters related to adoptions.

Read their FAQ.

I have obtained all the above information from the web. The information is neither comprehensive nor definitive.
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April 20, 2007

Virginia Tech Shooting.

The world looks a lot less safe after becoming a parent, does nt it? We start reacting to terrible events like these as a parent and personally, it scares the hell out of me. God bless the victims and their familes.

Sundar, Orchid, Fuzzy, SS and the Desimomzclub share their fears.

April 18, 2007

Birthday is on the air.

Mommyof2 celebrates a a double bonanza.

Sunita celebrates her daughters birthday. Pretty frock! :)

Moppets mom makes it a Happy Day.

SM plans a double whammy.

If I have missed any recent birthday bash, please comment with a link. I know for sure four more birthdays are coming up. March and April seems to be a busy month! ;)

April 15, 2007

New Moms.

Congratulations to the two brand new mommies, Trishna and Mona. May God bless the little ones Aadya and Hana with all the good things in the world!

Noodlehead, you are next! :)

April 12, 2007

Sleepless in Babyville.

A round up of some of the posts on the Sleeping issue.

Rohinis very informative post is here.

Mad Mommas emotional post is
here.

Mine is
here.

Desimomzclub has two posts
here and here.

ps.
Do leave a link in the comment if you have done a post on the same subject.

April 6, 2007

To have or not to have...

Below is the mail I got from a reader. Since Im also sailing in the same boat, it would be great to hear your thoughts on this issue. Is a family incomplete without a second child?

It seems like everyone of our friends is pregnant again. After a difficult pregnancy and first year, we have decided not to have another child. Most of the time I am fine with this decision, but every now and then, it feels strange and scary. I find myself revisiting the decision every few weeks and tormenting myself over whether it is the right thing or not. I feel guilty that I may be depriving my son of a sibling and then I wonder whether that is the right motivation for another child. Should I have another one only because I am afraid that this one will be lonely ?

As Indians, we live in a society where 2 kids is the norm. It is something everyone takes for granted. It is really difficult being the exception rather than the norm. I am working on coming to terms with this tough decision and was hoping to hear some words of wisdom from parents with one child who have found peace with their decision, instead of regrets.

I would really appreciate it if you could address this issue in
indianmommies.blogspot.com

Sahithis Mom has written a post on the same dilemma here. Seems like yesterday when I was going through the same dilemma for the first one. It never ends, does it?

An open letter to all Toddlers.

I am planning to frame this letter and hang it in Ashus room! Hilarious!

It's NOT yours. You seem to have adopted a mantra of "If I can see it, it's mine. If you have it, it's mine. If I think about it, it's mine." Let me tell you something, kiddos. You know when all of us leave in the morning, only to return home 8 hours later? We're at work earning a living. And while we're firm believers in the "mi casa es su casa" philosophy and don't really mind sharing our things with you, you need to ease up a little, ok?

I'm sure every parent with a toddler will relate to this one. Why don't you try writing an open letter too? Do mail me the link if you do.

April 5, 2007

Summy and the Doctor.

This post has stayed in my mind even after so many months. I totally relate to it now. Hubby and I say "And the Oscar goes to..." and laugh out loud whenever our daughter Ashu pulls a fast one on us. And I always remember this incident with Summy fondly.

Her regular doctor was out, so we saw another doctor. "So she has a stomach ache?" the doctor asked. I waved my hand and said "I don't know ..." thinking about how to put it without hurting Summy's feelings.

Belated Birthday wishes, Kiddo! :)

Having a baby in Bangalore.

Congratulations to S and N, soon to be mommas who mailed me and since both of them are in Bangalore, I thought this post will have lots of information for them. If you are planning to have a baby in Bangalore, this is a must read.

I lucked out with a very good doctor who was willing to listen to all my concerns (I talked to her about not wanting a C-section, for example; I was pretty nervous that I would be pressured into having a C-section), explain to me why something was prescribed and generally make the birth a collaborative process. This was a pleasant surprise. I had heard that doctors stood on a pedestal and told patients what needed to be done, without any explanations.

Don't forget to go through the comment section for lots of useful information on Hospitals and Doctors.

Have your say.

This website is going to be a link fest for the most part. You can send emails with links and they will be published here. It can be either your own post or any other post/article related to parenting.

Mention if you don't want to be given credit.

It would be great if you can keep this site in mind when you are reading something interesting or informative on any issue related to Parenthood and send a mail to indianmommies at gmail dot com with the link.

You can also send me an email if you need any information and I can post your query here.

Your suggestions are most welcome. indianmommies at gmail dot com is the email id to contact. Hope to see an active contribution from all of you.

April 4, 2007

Are we giving up too much?

I would like to be a working mom, yes! But I have never heard a more ridiculous reason to be one. "Oh What if my husband dies at 47? What will I do?" Please, give me a break! Have you never heard of Life Insurance? And when the father of my children "drops dead", I'm supposed to console my children by saying "Well, at least I have a job"? What Bull! And what a negative way to look at life! Chee chee chee!
Is it really worth it to be home when your second child loses his fourth tooth if something happens to your spouse and you end up losing the home entirely? Your children lose their rooms, their local area, their friends and their school. For them, the cost of having a stay-at-home mum is high indeed.

Thanks Akkare for the link.

What do we learn from our kids?

I have always wondered if mothers can be atheists. This post has made me realize its almost impossible. What do you think?

I’ve learnt that my womb has only been an instrument to bring this soul into the world and once brat is an adult my work will have been done, and what I do to bring brat up is only repaying my karmic debt to my mother for bringing me up. I believe now in the verse written by Kahlil Gibran which says your children are not yours to keep.I’ve learnt that the sky is different colours at various parts of the day and Jai Jai Bhagwanji actually sits up there with his crayon and watercolours to keep changing the look.

This reminds me to publish the post I have in my draft for a very long time on Moms and their belief in God.

Winkies Women.

As Kodis mom has written in the comments, only our dearest Mommy Blogger, Tharini, can write such a touching post on Tomato Jam!
Many days passed by in this manner. Then one day, she rolled up her sleeves, got into the kitchen and made some jam. Tomato jam. Red, ripe, juicy tomato jam. And that first batch was a killer. She offered it to him. He looked at it dubiously,and then at her with suspicion.

I always thought that I started blogging inspired by you. But today I found out you started blogging a couple of months after me. Anyways you are my inspiration Tharini! :) Heres to you.

Hello World!

Welcome to Indianmommies!

Do let me know
i) if I have missed any Desi Mom blogs in the blog roll.
ii) if you want to link some interesting mommy posts here.
iii) if you have any suggestions.


Email me at indianmommies at gmail dot com